Hidden Treasure

John David

Look at that face!  I just found this pic of JD at a 18 months.

I'm trying to look for the little treasures that are hidden around me each day & this is a perfect example.

Me And My Family

Here are some pics that were taken at my cousin Holly's wedding last month. This was a casual reception a week after they got married, so we're dressed in regular clothes.

My grandpa with his 7 remaining siblings. (He's in the back, on the end, behind the lady with the red pants.)  There were originally 11 of them. A good Catholic Iowa farm family. They needed lots of kids to work the farm. Even with bone cancer my grandpa works my uncle's huge farm as much as he can all summer & keeps all of us in tomatoes & corn. We can the tomatoes and freeze the corn. It's so good in the middle of a long winter to taste the garden & my grandpa's love.

My parents, my boys & I. (Chris had to work.)  My mom put all her weight back on since her breast cancer. She says she lost a boob, but gained almost 100 lbs., lol!

All of us including John's girlfriend, LeighAnne.  She's just like one of our own now :)

And finally me & my baby boys.

Jack looks a little doofy in that pic, but momma loves it anyway

Paint, Birdseed, Boys, & Silence

While reading a great post over at The Parenting Myth the other day, it reminded me of something.  She mentioned how silence while the children are not sleeping is a bad thing.

That made me think of a specific moment from my boy's childhood that was quite memorable.

Awake children (about 8 & 5), silence, white paint & a 25 lb. bag of birdseed do not go together in a way that will be pleasing to a mother.  It was however, very pleasing for said 8 & 5 year old, that is until momma found them.

They had started by mixing a little birdseed in with the paint.  (To this day I still don't know how they got the paint can open.)  Then a little splashed on one of them.  By the time I found them they were coated in paint & birdseed.  I was tempted to leave them in the yard & let the robins clean them so I wouldn't have to.

I remember feelings of horror, this room will never, ever, be clean again & I will be finding birdseed for years!  Then I laughed.  I laughed until I almost peed & the terrifed look on my boy's faces was instantly replaced with glee.

Laughing is the only thing you can do in these situations & it's still a hilarious memory.  I only wish I had thought to grab the camera, but it's one of those mind pictures that I will never forget.

I love my boys & I love the crazy situations they've gotten me into over the years.  It sure has been a journey!

Also don't forget to enter my Shutterfly giveaway!

My Baby Is In High School!!!

I know I'm lucky.  My boy is here with me.  I have several friends who have lost children, who would be overjoyed to be where I'm at today, so please forgive me if this is insensitive.

It's just while I watch my boys grown into amazing young men, every step towards independence takes them a step further away from me in some way.  Sometimes, like now just writing about it, the tears come as I remember my little men who always wanted to snuggle with momma.  When you love with all of your heart, all of your soul, and all of your being, letting go hurts so much, even while you rejoice in their accomplishments.

Anywhoo, here are some pictures of Jack's "clap in" yesterday. The freshmen come in alone at the beginning of the day and are clapped into the big gym by parents & loved ones. The drum line plays in front of them which makes it really cool.

Jack wasn't really interested my picture taking, but he's the one with the messenger bag.

My handsome Jack.  (Yes we can usually only see one eye!)

And one last shot of him walking away from me into his exciting new adventure.

I love you, baby Jack.

Mini-Van Blessings!

My mom mini-van was dying a slow painful death. We got it used from my BIL & SIL a few years ago. It had over 100,000 miles on it but was in good shape and had been maintained well.


It got kind of sad after JD started driving and accidentally got a side mirror ripped off. We kept having to dump more & more money into it and knew it was on our last legs. The air conditioning is also dead, a big dent in the side, and it gets about 10 miles to the gallon. Since Chris is the only one working we really didn't have the money to get a "new" or new to us van.





God stepped in and made my dad decide it was time for him to get a new vehicle. He was generous to sell us his used mini van for a fantastic price. It's a 2008 with only 56,000 miles on it!





There's not one stain, one spot, one scratched part on this van!





If I have to drive a mom-van, I'm glad to have a really nice one again.


It's got all the bell's & whistles and has been impeccably maintained. I couldn't be happier with a brand new vehicle. This has the drivers side sliding door, rear heat & radio controls, working air & no parts ripped off accidentally by teenage boys. (Of course I share this with JD & Jack starts drivers training on Monday [EEEK].)


Now if I could just get brave enough to driver it over 35 miles an hour out of fear that I might mess it up it would be great!

My Baby!

Okay I would like someone to explain how my baby got so big. In the last year my youngest, Jack, has grown about 5 inches. He loves to point out how he is taller than me now.

Jack will be 15 in a few weeks & just ended his years in middle school. Next year he will be a freshman at my old high school.

Before ending his middle school experience, Jack won a President's Educational Award. Here's a shot of him getting his award.



Besides being a great kid, he is living up to some of my musical expectations by loving bands like The Cure, the Violent Femmes & Bob Marley.

He was recommended by his language art's teacher for a program where he will be studying over the summer and taking a test in August to get credit for & skip 9th grade language arts. If he decides not to do this (it requires a ton of reading and doing reports over the summer) he will be in honors english at high school.

Jack has always had his own sense of style, I don't know too many kids with a top hat, but my Jack has one!





Here's Jack as he left his middle school.



Next up is driver's training...I'm gonna need more xanax!

This Is It, Hooky Day

Friday I decided that my youngest son & I needed to spend some time together. I knew they weren't doing much in school that day, so I went and picked him up at 10:00.

From there we went to see the Michael Jackson movie, This Is It. We both left the movie theater feeling sad, but the movie was, IMHO, quite good. It brought things back to him as a performer and let me tell you the moves and the voice were still there. I don't see how he could have possibly been on all the drugs they say he was on and still come across as well as he does on screen.

The his singing and his dancing really take the focus off of his messed up face and showed him as a great performer. In the end we were sad that his life had been cut so short. (In case your wondering, I do not believe he molested children, I think he was a weird, emotionally warped man.)

Anywho, after the movie we went to K-Mart and bought Jack some new pajama pants & his favorite for dinner, Spam! We got some chili dogs for lunch, picked him up a video game from Blockbuster and came home. Now he's on the couch playing his game in his new PJ pants just waiting for his Spam feast later (gag).



In case you can't tell, he didn't want to have his picture taken, lol!

If none of you have never had a hooky day with your kids I highly recommend it. It's great special time that Jack knows I set aside just for him and him alone. My friend Mimi at He & Me + 3 does a weekly "You're Gonna Miss This Post" about things she's going to miss about her kids. Every single week what she posts is something I already miss with my boys both being teenagers, so I'm taking as much time as I can to be with them now, before their completely gone!

Teenage Boys...

Does anyone really understand the creatures known as teenage boys? As an only child, I certainly don't.

Jack thought it would be fun to get into this bin. Notice he has his cell phone with him, I believe he even showers with it.



Oskar is unsure what to do with this development.



John David has no question what do do when one's younger brother is trapped.



Luckily with some intervention from mom, Jack made it out before his air supply ran out!



*Yes, that is a trashy looking sheet hanging from my window. There isa blind, but allows light through which is apparantly unacceptable for television viewing if it is sunny. No, it's not sunny in these photos. Again, I don't understand these people who used to be my babies!

My First Baby

Hi guys! Still getting over the swine flu. Make sure you get flu shots for your family, this flu has been the worst I have ever had in my 42 years!

I thought I would share a few of John David's senior pics. He's 17 & a senior in high school this year. He had friend from the yearbook take these pics. They did over 400 pics for $100 dollars. Way better than the $1,000 through a studio. They haven't done the formal ones yet, but here are some of my favorite casual shots.













How the heck did he get this big??? I know I'm waaayyy to young to have a child this old!

A Thank You To My Sons

On Mother's Day I always reflect on my sons. Remembering when they were small, and missing those days. Laughing at the memories surrounding their births. Marveling at the young men they have become.

If it wasn't for them I feel like I would be nothing today. While I made them, they made me. No matter how down I am, I can look at them & know that I am a success. I am a great mom, who has raised 2 fantastic boys. No anxiety or bipolar disorder will ever take that away from me.

For all of you hoping to be mothers, I pray that your dreams come true one way or another.

And for John David & Jack Andrew, a million thanks just for being you. I coudn't be prouder or love you more.

File This Under: Things I Never Thought I Would Say

Shouted at my teenage sons this evening,

"Why is there parmesan cheese in the bathroom sink?!?"

And no it wasn't the container of cheese, it was cheese sprinkled all over the vanity & sink.

The answer? Even more baffling than the question,

"I accidentally got a bunch of cheese in my hair so I went in the bathroom to brush it out." This was Jack.

While this conversation was going on, JD was wearing these that he brought home from his friends house.

*sigh*

The Future Of Our Country...

...and future of my gene pool, is currently sitting on the couch (spring break) watching a man play "Angels We Have Heard on High" on an ocarina (flute type thing) made of broccoli.

If you have a minute & 47 seconds you don't need back you can watch him here.

Ramblings

Well bronchitis has swept through the house like a plague. 2 teen boys & 1 mom felled. Guess who still has to wait on the teen boys?

I did see a new psychiatrist on Tuesday & he confirmed my diagnoses of bipolar type 2, along with social anxiety disorder. He's weaning me off of some meds & replacing them with new ones. We'll see how it goes, it could take months to find the right combination to suit my brain chemistry, but I'm optimistic to be taking a step forward.

After just finishing the last class for my Associate degree in Allied Health Technology, today I start the first class for my Bachelor of Health Servies Administration. I thought I had a little break, but oh well.

The class I'm starting now is the Psychology of Death & Dying. I'm sure it will be interesting, but I have to say this instructor is requiring A LOT of work. One of the many things I have to do this week is write a letter (500 words minimum) that I would like have read at my funeral! Fun times. It's an online class, so it's a minimum of 5 days a week participation.

Oh & the boys have next week off for spring break, so even if they are better, they will need to be fed, entertained, picked up after, etc. *sigh*

I anticipate being able to have a restful, relaxing day in about 4-6 weeks.

And He's Off

I am currently sitting here sobbing as I type. My JD got his real license today & just left, ON HIS OWN, to go & visit some of his friends.

I know it's in God's hands, but I am so petrified. I cannot explain to you the feeling of having him pull out of the driveway, on his own, for the first time.

He's a good driver. This just puts a finer point on the fact that he's moving farther away from me every day.

Just say a little prayer that he will make it home safely & that I won't have a full blown break down in the meantime!

My Sunshine

(This was scheduled to post at 3/14/09 @ 7:14 am. Blogger obviously was asleep then, so I'll post it a day late!)

This is John David. My nickname for him is & always has been Sunshine because when he would wake up at night I would sing him to sleep with You Are My Sunshine.

Today my Sunshine is 17 years old. I am proud of the young man he is & the man that he is becoming, but I honestly can't figure out how it's been 17 years & how my baby to to be 6 ft. tall.

I get weepy sentimental on both of my boys birthdays, but with him being this old, I'm starting to measure my time with him, here, with this house as the center of his world. I don't just love this kid, I really like him & just thinking of him leaving the nest breaks my heart. So I will try to enjoy all the time I have with him & overlook the fact that he is a large, often annoying, teenage boy!

End Of Rope

Recipe for Ugliness:

1 grouchy, mouthy 16 year old

1 over-caffeinated 13 year old

1 mom, with one frayed, frazzled, last nerve

Mix together for about 12 hours.